Just Another Ordinary Day- NASCAR, Cannibalism, and Wal-Mart

How did we get here? - To the point of no return.  Ignorance seems to climb the highest peaks, and intelligence seems to sink beyond the horizon.  I mean really, a woman pulls a gun on a Wal-Mart clerk because they wouldn't take her dollar-off internet coupon.  

A Woman in some random place (that must be filled with trailers) sold her child to a man with the intent to make explicit home movies.  The child was only 18 months old.  And a bird landed on a top of the smokestack of the Vatican- and it is fucking sign from GOD.

I have spent that last few weeks studying Literary Theory, and reading material from the late 1800’s. And to tell you the truth- nothing has changed at all. I feel like Marlow on that Steamboat chugging up the Congo surrounded by cannibals. Only the cannibals that I am surrounded by… eat themselves. 

They slowly nibble away at themselves and it seems as if they've figured out a way to deal with pain and get others to join in. I mean, really- it’s a family affair.  “Are you done with your ear, son?” 

My daughter’s teacher (or some non-English speaking assistant) spelled socks as "sox" on this week’s homework packet. 

The NRA hijacked NASCAR in Texas. Because there is nothing like carrying a clip with 500 bullets as you recite Bible verses.  The NRA 500 is very fitting actually.

America got beat by a third world country in a game they created! More proof that years of giving orders and watching other people doing labor equates to the lack of physical abilities.

They say they've found the GOD particle by smashing things into one another.  And since GOD is just a particle that gives things mass, I guess we will have to wait for another Big-Bang for him to return! And you thought 2013 was a long wait!

New York was told that there is at least 16 ounces of Freedom left (or at least soda). And Republicans have cloned some Latino that believes the bullshit they feed the rest of their poor brainwashed followers. You can tell that he is a clone because clones need more water than real humans. They hope after midnight they can produce more Spanish speaking clones so America can get the next Pope.

Some clown in California wants to build an island or a floating city 12 miles off the Californian coast (technically in international waters) so that highly qualified immigrants can magically create start-ups. Well, since our children think that socks are spelled “soxs”, I'm sure these start-ups will hire a bunch of legal citizens. 

A woman, whom you may have heard of, from Facebook, must have amnesia and forgot that her degree has an Ivy League college on it. In others words- women, don't “lean in”,… “buy-in”.

Of course, I'm not perfect.  “Son, pass me that finger, I’m hungry.” I watch men with chiseled bodies in tight pants run into one another and play with balls. I have spent the last 72 hours watching millions being passed out like Halloween candy. 

I wonder if life was really that bad in the 1800s. It probably was better, except for I would have been Django pissed off about what happen to my white wife. Or I would have been in the house, cause manual labor is not for the intelligent.

But I bet they couldn't “Harlem Shake”.  It would have been the Congo Shake. So next time you go to Wal-mart with your dollar-off coupon for bullets, just make sure you leave your gun at home. 

And can we please stop posting angles in the cloud made by Photoshop. And stop posting that fake car dealership prank. We are eating ourselves and slowing dying.  There will be nothing but computers left standing- like the Pyramids. And the Next species will wonder how we let such a wonderful world go to waste!!!!!

Jungle Fever- Redux

I was standing outside of Wal-Mart smoking on a cancer stick and a young black gentleman walked up to me mumbling something. I could not understand what he was saying through his thick southern accent. As he walked closer we shook hands and I was almost blinded by the gold teeth that filled the top row of his mouth.


Before he went into the store he stated “man do you see all these white chicks? They are hot. I want one of these.” I agreed with him with a smile and thought to myself “what the hell did he just say?” Believe me, this dude looked like he was in a candy store- eyes wide open and drooling. This was one of those times that I was glad that I separated from my wife for a second and let her get the sandwiches.  If she was there I would have never had the best laugh of the day.

I won’t lie, for a second I felt like I pulled off mission impossible. But then, after thinking about all of the work that it takes to make an interracial marriage work, the cloud of doom slowly started to float above.

Is this the mentality that people take when it comes to marriage?  Are we trying to find someone to be with based solely upon color? I have dated all types of women and ethnicity was not the first trait that I based my preference. Being in a multicultural marriage is not for the weak of heart and those that continue to believe that racism has been eliminated are sorely mistaken.

But by all means, if you are ready to be treated like a second-hand citizen, be scrutinized by black women and white men, confuse all the children in the world- even yours, and live on the edge of sanity at times, then go for it!  But be prepared to adapt to all types of settings and know that it takes a strong couple with thick skin to deal with these issues.

I do not think that it is a coincidence that African American studies and Women studies are placed next to each other in the book store. It is like they have all of the minorities in one place. I mean blacks, gays, lesbians, and feminists can all huddle up in one section of the book store and exchange stories of oppression and frustration. Imagine that bumper sicker on the back of a car.  Of course, there is also a book in that section on why black men marry white women… written by a black woman. Hmmm.

But this confusion and mass hysteria is not only for the couple but the in-laws as well. Like the time I walked into Subway with my in-laws and it looked like a Klan was having a field trip.  I was used to it by now, but my mother in-law looked at me and we smiled. She knew that these people were confused and upset. I wonder what they were thinking. I just wanted to tell them that these people adopted me or better yet- “do not worry, there are still a few white women left for you”.

The challenges are huge. I mean, imagine shopping for an anniversary card. Do I pick the two white hands or the black hands? Why is it that every doll my daughter has looks like Dora? Or what do I say when other kids walk up to her speaking Spanish?  But there are so many benefits as well. We strategically send each other into certain places to get things done. For example if I need to go into a store in a black neighborhood guess who is going in? Or if we need directions on how to get out of the middle of nowhere it is her turn.

There have been so many times that I have heard people say they are searching for a “white girl” or I only date “black men”. There is nothing wrong with having preferences in a mate, but to only target specific races doesn’t seem right.

I did not search out for my wife on a web-site, or go to a club that was only filled with white women. It was a chance encounter that included great conversations and a few laughs that have led to years of love and raising a family. It did take some getting use to being the only black person in the room, but when it is all said and done we are all people. Love is something that should not be dependent on color or status because at the end of the day, we all are going to have to want to make it work for a marriage of any kind to succeed.   

There are still times that I feel rather angry at the way that I am treated and when people feel as if because I am married to a white woman that I am different from other black males. That is not the case. Sometimes I feel as if it has excluded me from my own community. When the black jokes start flying like June bugs it gets rather old and takes a suit of steel and a whole lot of love to make it through the night. I still feel as if I am Public Enemy No. 1 and that at any moment the blame will be pointed in my direction. 

I think multicultural children are some of the most beautiful children in the world. A message that we should all intertwine and marry in this world as this will slowly erase some of the racism and tension that we face.

It is a hard battle and one that some are not willing to fight. I have many friends that are in interracial marriages and right now I would like to applaud them all because we are changing the world one family at a time. Thanks to the last presidential election our children have a role model that they can look up to that is more than a movie star or an athlete. Who is, by the way, interracial.   

And to the young brother that I ran into at the store today, I hope you find the right person no matter what color they are. Oh, and to the black woman who wrote that book on why I, a black man, married my white wife- can you call me before you profit on your lack of information on the subject? Thanks.