My American Experience

I have lived in many places in this United States of Crazies. I was trapped with Texas for seven years. The dude confused the hell out of me. I understood that he held his pants up with the black book, but boy did he live a sinful life. He always had to be told to clean up his room. “Don’t mess with Texas”- of course most people think that is because he is such a badass, but it is exactly the opposite. 

There is nothing like watching a redneck (they like that title), spitting his chew out the window while you are all waiting in the extreme heat for the light to change. Of course everything is cheap- who would pay top dollar to enjoy the flames of hell- would you?

Cockroaches are often referred to as “water bugs”.  June bugs fly directly into the light over and over again and they deny evolution? But I did enjoy stepping on these almost prehistoric creatures- squash and scrape that was my routine. Spiders were often bigger than most birds, and the fire ants that came from the banana boats really needed to be nuked.  I am sure that Texas will return, they have that fighter’s spirit out there- I give them that.

Not everything in Texas was, or is, bad. I did enjoy their style of BBQ. There is nothing like watching a high school football game under the lights, of course, right next to a natural gas rig that is spewing out toxic fumes making everyone in the town sick.  But they are often too drunk to realize that the EPA and the Railroad Commission could care less if they are slowly dying. I watched one of the most beautiful buildings for gladiators ever created being built as they snatched the land from people that didn’t want to move but were handed some nickels and dimes and told to find a new home. But I did get to BOOOOOOOOOOO Bush with his “leave every child behind” philosophies.

When they say Texas is a whole different country- they really mean it. If you would like to lease land, feed deer tiny bits of most likely fake corn, then sit in a stand and kill Bambi- that is the place for you. If you would like to enter a Church, praise God while you look at a Confederate flag on the arm of a group of so-called children of God, then that is the place for you. If being racially profiled is your gig- he is waiting for you.

I also lived in Arizona for a few years. There is nothing like living in a fucking oven surrounding by the most beautiful rock formations ever. I was a college student along with my girlfriend (now wife). This was the first time that my future wife lived outside of California. She was surprised by the amount of white people that she saw (she is white). She also thought it was odd that dressing up like you were going to the club was not necessary when only going shopping- darn Californians.

We were both chased by some Latinos- who must have thought some sort of revolution was taking place and I was on the wrong side. (No, really- physically chased.)  We met a lesbian couple that seemed to hate white people… unless they needed some sugar or a ride somewhere. The mall seemed to be the best place to get into a fight, along with a bar filled with Native Americans that escaped the Reservations and wanted to kidnap my girlfriend and sell me back to my masters or skin me.   I couldn’t figure it out- but we got out of there.

I still return to Arizona at times. I have a lot of friends that still live there. They have a nice stadium, the heat is hotter than anything I have ever been in, and the women still wear no clothes. They don’t care if they are size 2 or 80- they are going to wear a bikini and you will see it all. Personally I believe that Arizona is nothing more than a suburb of LA. If you can’t afford Cali- Arizona will welcome you, along with some other individuals hiding from something or someone.

I also lived in Oregon- twice. I really enjoyed that place. It was a mixture of California and living in a rain forest. I would often pray for the sun, but it would never show up long enough. He would poke through the clouds tease you and then allow for the clouds to continue to piss on you again.

I had a great time, being chased by cowboys- (things always like chasing me- or I like running when I calculate the odds are not in my favor). Drugs could be found everywhere, no one was from Oregon but the old people, and the young people that lived there seemed to have more experience with drugs than any kid in the inner city. The place was beautiful, but I had to escape the rain. I could not take it anymore. Plus all of the Californians that I didn’t like were all moving there.

Why am I telling you all of these random experiences that I have had in different states? Because from my experience I can understand this disconnect and division in our country- (back to politics). 

Most people do not leave their state or even their hometown for that matter. The bubbles that we live in protect us from reality. The reality that all of our experiences are different is something that is hard for some to even comprehend. Of course Texas has a huge respect and admiration for guns and saving babies before they are born, but turning around and killing them when they are adults. Either by natural gas wells, or the prison system. Arizona is nothing but a gun range in the middle of the desert that is really a sibling of Los Angeles. Oregon is beautiful, the best place to read a book, climb a mountain, and drink coffee- all at the same time.

But returning to my bubble of California had to be one of the best choices that I have made. I would rather raise my children in a state that is open minded, falling into the ocean, too dumb to figure out that they need high-speed rail, the smell of reefer everywhere, the land often shakes but at least my stuff in Texas will not end up in Oklahoma, religion seems optional, like clothes on any day in the city, everything is expensive, new stadium is on its way, and if you think it- they will outsource to get it built.

I love the United States, but I hate the brainwashing and manipulation of the citizens. All of our bubbles keep us safe- but they do pop, and when they do- RUN, sure you might not find a place that is like the one you left. They all have good and bad, enjoy the good, and unfriend the bad. I have only lived in four states, I wish I could have lived in more. But my experiences have offered me a better insight on why the United States has been simplified to coloring by numbers, either red or blue- well I’m coloring with green- hey that’s my crayon.

Grab the Stagecoach and Hit the Road

Anytime California representatives suggest a new law addressing gun control, I always hear a handful of California residents proclaiming they are going to pack up and move to Texas.  Many point to the fact that Texas has fewer regulations than California. This may be true- but then I point to reasons for regulations- like the plant that blew up in West Texas, and destroyed a neighborhood, killing several people.  I also point to the fact that they are using money from the Obama Administration to rebuild… and repair their roads.

As a Californian that lived in Texas, I lived it. I lived the isolation of another perspective. I faced racism on a regular basis.  One day, I was standing outside watering my grass and a female neighbor said “Hi Negro neighbor”, in a half- joking, half-serious tone. Now, don’t get me wrong- this is not all of Texas, but this is my experience.

There were days when I was stuck driving behind a pick-up truck covered in “I hate Obama” stickers and a Confederate flag waving in the air.  Yes, this new law to some can be considered a removal of rights. Why should you have to subject yourself to a background check to get bullets?

Well, if you have nothing to hide, then you should have nothing to worry about, correct? Never mind that the Government has just made it mandatory for Google to hand over your data- including the search for how many bullets it will take to kill a deer and religious quotes to be plastered on a Facebook wall directly from the Bible Belt.

A background check for a gun and a background check for bullets is nothing that the law abiding citizen should be afraid of. If you are using the gun to go hunting- killing animals that you fed- or for the intruder that happens to be lurking around every corner, than you are fine.

Shouldn't there be one more layer of protection for our children? I know that those who are worried about this background check live in a bubble. A bubble of Faux News, Rushmouth commentary, and the Sarah Palin Pit-bull and lip stick speech. I wonder if she had any other quotes but couldn't fit them on her hand.

There is a lot to love about Texas. I loved the thunderstorms, the cheap homes, and the spirit of the average Texan. I loved watching the Cowboys and their owner, Jerry Jones build that masterpiece of a Stadium. I even love the slogan “Don’t Mess with Texas”, but… that was started due to the high amount of liter that is often left on the road.

I loved Friday Night Football, even with the Natural Gas oil rig spewing toxic fumes in the air and underground the stadium… and our homes.

And of course, California is not perfect. Houses are expensive, gas is high, and by only speaking one language- I am the minority- and I’m not white. But I do live in the countryside of California. I get to see horses and cows run free, smell the farmland in the summer, and see the seasons change. I hate the traffic and I hate the disparity between the advantaged and disadvantaged. No place is perfect. Not Texas. Not California. Not even the United States.

But we have to understand the point that I have stated may times. We are so fucking divided by religion, economics, race, and political affiliation that we cannot see through the rhetoric. We often say that Freedom is not “free”- as the soldiers return in caskets. But then take away freedoms in every state.

I did find that it was rather odd that Texas had its own Pledge of Allegiance. Personally I believe that this increases the division of that State from other states. But that is fine. You can enjoy the intellectual properties that come from California- and enjoy the natural gas that may be linked to disease and deaths of citizens across the country.

California regulates to save lives- Texas deregulates to make money. California is strapped because of mismanagement and the programs that often help the disadvantaged and maybe offer them an opportunity to climb to middle class status.

Look, if you live in California and hate the laws then move. Climb in your futuristic stage coach with your loaded guns and head east. There is no place like Texas, like there is no place like California. A matter a fact there is no place as we know, like Earth- so enjoy where the fuck we are. Just remember what they say- the grass always looks greener on the other side of the fence.

I like many of the laws in California- I like the diversity in culture. I love the weather, I love the ocean, and I like not being pulled over by a cop and being asked if I am driving my car and where the fuck I work- Maybe my skin tone played a role in my experience. It is kind of hard to not take a racist joke off the lips of a redneck personal without wanting to shove my Nike Airs up his ass.

We should all be Americans, instead of individuals that are restricted by invisible state lines. 

The Stove Has Been Turned Off

An interesting point was brought to my attention while I was at a local café. America is no longer a melting pot. Do not get me wrong, it is true that we are a country of immigrants and different nationalities. But do we really live together? Do we have a common goal? Or do we isolate ourselves to our own culture?

I often record in one of the poorest parts of San Francisco. One day I had to take my children with me until their mother could pick them up. My son looked at me and said “Daddy, there are two different Californias”. I looked at him and his wide eyes scanning the scenery, and said “yes son, there is”. This is one of those moments as a father you are waiting for. The moment to explain some real shit to your child.

My children have not been exposed to the real world. They’ve never seen streets filled with trash, homes that looked like they were going to collapse and police cars every 10 minutes. But this was nothing new to me at all. I was exposed to this as a child, and I knew that this was the real world to the black community. Even though my grandmother moved me away from the city when I was in kindergarten, I still had the black experience growing up.

My father use to take me to the barber shop in the Fillmore. I would buy clothes and shoes right next door. I would visit my Grandmother in the Bayview district and walk to the store for 10 cent candy. Then I would return home to stare at the ocean and fall asleep to the sound of the waves hitting the shore.  I grew up knowing that I was in one world but there were others struggling and suffering in another.

This is not about staying in the Asian, Black, or Latino community, but rather assimilate and become one. America should be a country with a common goal to make things better for everyone. What is our common goal? Do we have one at all? Can we please pick- and soon- before we have no chance at all?

In order for America to return to glory we to need to come together and realize that we are repeating history. Sure it may not be full out Civil Rights in the streets, but some of the scenes in the news could be changed to black and white and we may not be able to tell the difference.

While I lived in Texas, every day I would see the Texas flag everywhere I turned. It was sort of like a cult thing in a way, but it worked. I had pride for the state of Texas, and was proud to be a Texan even though I was a transplant. There was common goal in the Lone Star State pride, the pride of being a Texan. My son and daughter still have that pride to this day. They enjoy California and family and their new friends, but when you say “Texas” it makes them smile. The pride they have should be the same pride that we have when we see the American flag.

But in order for this to truly happen we have to assimilate, we have to define an American culture that has rituals that embrace our different cultures but remains focused on us being united. Without all citizens of a country being behind one goal we will accomplish nothing. We will continue to be divided by politics, religion, sexual preference, gender, and last but not least, class.

I am proud that my children have lived in Texas and California. I’ve learned how to assimilate myself in an environment that was not known to me. I knew that in order to be successful and to make it in Texas I would have to assimilate. Assimilating is not destroying your own cultural beliefs, but rather accepting the community that you live in and becoming one.

We do not need separate classes for children that speak one language; we need classes that teach our children all languages, so that we can compete in a global world. In order to return to number one we have to realize that we are no longer the top dog- we need an objective.

A melting pot is something that takes ingredients from all over the world and makes one delicious dinner- a common goal.