The Denial of America

America is in denial. Every part of her. She once was a beacon of hope. Men and women would rush into her arms for forgiveness, in hope of a new start. The chance to build a relationship, find themselves, and leave the world of pain and hurt that they once roamed. America has flirted with many men. Some men were loyal and faithful; they caressed her and treated her with respect. But other men have broken her down and tore her apart.

She often cannot identify the methods of the abuse. Only those on the outside can whisper in her ear on what cause her ills. Some days it is the verbal abuse and the bashing of her children. Sometimes it is the physical abuse. The slight twist of an arm that leaves a small bruise that is easily hidden. Sometimes it is the neglect or the lack of love from her short lived companionship.

Some men pamper her. They shower her with promises and speak of such things as hope and change. But these men are nothing more than crooks with endless pockets. These individuals that have hidden agendas and hide secretes of their own that they dare not share. They often have affairs with others, and pretend that America is their only love. But the truth is that their only love is not America or her children. They want nothing but status and to control the beacon that America used to shine on the world.

These men fight for her, tooth and nail. They fight to change her, make her better for them, not her. The have beaten her down so far to the ground that she will never stand a chance.

 America is in denial. There are no seven steps, no magic pill that can bring America back to life. She is on the verge of depression, suicide- the lonely dark road of self-destruction. There is no caped crusader rushing down from the heavens. There is nothing but laws made by men, and regulation that leaves her with insomnia. Her heart beats faster and faster, and she searches for the answers. She has escaped such ills as slavery, bankruptcy, and a war within. But her soul is breaking, and she is near the end.

These men know what they are doing to her. They often boast about their victories, and conquests. But to these men she is only a mistress. They know that their relationship with her cannot last forever. In order to court her they pull and tug, tug and pull.  They continue to shout their rhetoric as a mating call like animals in the wild.

Some may even run full steam and lock their horns until the last man is standing and the crowd cheers and chants their name. But with a smile America’s fate is sealed. The honeymoon is over there is no chance for a divorce.  Their relationship is set in stone and for this brief moment she must stand the tournament.

Will America ever escape the denial? Will she defend herself and her children? Or will she seek men that treat her the same over and over again. Each time she is handed away she is less of the woman that she was before they took their vows. Will her children ever come of age and become brave? Will they demand to be treated with more respect than their mother? Or will they grow to hate one another?

It seems they will also stand in denial. But America, I beg you to leave him. Better yet, leave them all and start anew. Return to that woman that was loving and caring. Demand that your sons and daughters are brought home. Demand that your children are allowed to grow and prosper.  

America, in you I still hold faith. I know that your fate is not sealed in stone. Please stand up and fight. I beg you to escape this world of denial. Leave these controlling men and become free. Your denial is killing you. You are bleeding to death. Please America, before within you there is nothing left.

Dads, Welcome to the Club

            I have been a stay at home father for a while now. I love it, but I also prepared myself for the new work force at the same time. I have completed my Associates, Bachelors, and am currently enrolled in my Masters degree.

            It is a hard job. I was left with my son in my arms when he was two weeks old. I was ready for the challenge. I was also lucky enough to have some experience. I worked with my mother at a daycare center that offered an after school program during the summer. I was also responsible for working with children ranging from 1-3 years old in foster care.

            These children had many different challenges. Their mothers were crack addicts and this addiction was passed down to the children. The children had many different behavioral problems; some of them had violent responses to the simplest request.

            There is a new movement towards men staying at home and raising their children. This is great news. But dads, do all us other dads a favor and prove all of the “nay-sayers”, wrong, and do not let the world take a crap on your manhood.

            There is nothing like being there with you children, if possible. Cherish it, and teach them what the world is all about early. I had to deal with the battles and inner-demons of feeling like a failure, but I did my job, and I did my job well.

            I also supported my wife. Emotional support is huge, because they also feel and fight their own inner-demons. This type of role reversal is rather hard. Women often face a barrage of questions while they are in the workforce.

            I did not hold my wife back from doing what needs to be in the corporate world. I knew that she would have to attend dinners after work hours, and that she would also have to continue her education, to break the glass ceiling.

            Even to this day, there are long hours on both of our schedules. I am the taxi driver, the tutor, the cook, and even the psychologist. But it works for my family and in this economy we are doing fine.    

            I made it through the early ages with no broken arms, no diaper rashes, and no news stories of lost children at the park. I know that shortly I will be entering the work-force and I hope that my education allows for me to create my own business.

            S,o to the new stay-at-home dads, welcome to the club.  But know that this is also an opportunity to improve your skills.  Take time for yourself because it is needed. And support your other half.  Do what you would expect of them if they were at home. When my wife walks in the front door dinner is ready, homework is done, and the house is clean.

            It is not just about being at home with the kids, but holding down the fort, and raising children that are prepared  to deal with the world outside.